a few things

1. we successfully moved into our new apartment. in fact, i feel it was the most successful moving day ever, since my parents and andrew's parents came to help. we ended the festivities with pizza, dragonball Z (on the only channel we can get on our tv, lolz), and a dramatic poetry reading.

2. andrew got promoted at work, and is now a big, bad supervisor. HAHA! that is a happy, triumphant haha, not a "haha i am laughing at you," haha.

3. in one of my less wonderful moments, i poured water all over my computer and then let it sit in a puddle for over an hour, so it broke. obviously. electronic parts don't take to swimming in a pool of my leaky water bottle's making. andrew, being the kind and benevolent husband that he is, bought me a new computer. i'm typing on it. feeling guilty with each keystroke.

4. i'm having a major desire to sit and knit for a few hours, and i have about 20 projects i want to start, but i've been working on 2 blankets for the last month/months and i need to finish them before beginning something new. sigh.

5. a while back, i learned about god's mercy, when i found myself at the end of a conversation, having said only graceful and wise words. shortly after it ended, however, i was filled with RAGE!! god's mercy, while bottomless and bountiful, is apparently only given to me in situations where he knows i can't control myself, and that i absolutely need to. it was really miraculous, and i have been thanking him for it ever since. i think the level of rage that filled me afterward is a testimony to how that conversation could have gone, had god not been there in a miraculous way. since then, i've been asking for self-control and mercy.

the end.

being less honest and trying not to be mean.

i started this blog as an extension of my etsy store and now it's turned into an extension of my journal, which i never write in to begin with. i think writing in a journal is one of those things that i really always mean to do, but never actually start doing. somehow, writing in this blog is easier, though some would argue, less honest. (there's just something about knowing you've got an audience.)

bullet points of my life:

- we're moving in 2 weeks exactly. OH MY GOSH. nothing is packed.
- still hiding out from mean guy in the parking lot who yelled at me last week after i parked "wrong". constantly thinking about if he's planning to hit/call a tow truck on my car.
- thankful to have a job even if sometimes it drives me insane.

.....and i digressed from bullet points in my mind. so many times i compose sentences in my head, and i imagine how they'll come across to my readers, and in this case, i was going to write something scathingly mean. yes, it was meant for just one person in particular, and not one of my friends, so it's possible this person may never see it even if i wrote it. but the possibility still exists because this is the internet, so i can't write it. i can't convince myself to. BUT I WANT TO. i'm really struggling with hateful attitudes in this situation.

see, this is a situation where i should be using my private journal. yet, i'm not. probably because i'm lazy and my handwriting, previously so neat and pretty when i was in school, has now spiraled out of control and become nearly illegible. one day, when i'm a housewife, i'm going to get it back in shape.

ps. sometimes, when someone who is not really my friend acts like they think we're friends, i just want to say, "we aren't friends. go away." and that is how truly mean my heart is. only by the generosity of god do i have any friends at all. in fact, i'm pretty sure i've actually said this to someone before, maybe at college?

wishing for a wall to pin some photos to.

some things i've thought about recently:

1) i miss taking pictures of things that i think are beautiful, and i miss discussing these pictures with other people who have different ideas about beauty. i should take pictures again, so i don't miss it anymore.
2) people can get really worked up over something as trivial as a parking spot. really, world? REALLY?

AND

3) the only appropriate uses of the expression "mmmmm" is about food and sex. and if you're not talking about food and you use this expression, everyone is assuming that you're trying to charge your words with sexual energy. example: "mmmmm crayons...." or "mmmmm i love watching bill o'reilly...."

that's really all for me today, as far as words go. here's some pictures from this evening.





ps. i hope everyone has noticed that i didn't once mention knitting in this entire post. except for now, but this doesn't count, because it's a ps.

nobody wants to eat, and i promise i own a camera.

1. lady gaga. she goes out of her way to be weird, and i'm not sure i consider it art. however, i still laugh out loud (i still always contemplate just typing "lol" hm) every time i hear "bad romance" because of this. i'm not sure what that says about me. probably that i don't have children yet and haven't reached the point where saying "bad words" is offensive.

2. yesterday, while i was at the grocery store, i was thinking about where i was a year ago, and how much my life has changed. this time last year, i was at college, planning my final art show, frantically developing photos, spending every night in the dark room or the mac lab. i lived with one of my best friends, i worked a few jobs, and i had a whole life in that little town. my teachers all encouraged me to go somewhere with my art - get noticed and become an artist. now that i've had a year to step back and look at art in my life, i realize that enjoy making art for classes, and for gifts, but i really don't enjoy art for its own sake. sometimes i miss making things that speak for themselves to the glory of god, but now i'm thinking that maybe i still do make those things - just on a smaller scale.

maybe not. that's a question: can knitted blankets and scarves be for the glory of god, or are they just a piece of fabric that took way too long to make?

whenever i miss making art, though, i very quickly remember that i don't have the tools anymore, since i left college. the tools are expensive and i'll probably never have them again. so, i'll have to make different art. because it's true, i have to make something.

3. vacuum cleaners. i got a new vacuum cleaner, and i honestly vacuumed our one rug for 10 minutes yesterday, out of sheer joy. it works so well! we're moving to an apartment with carpet, so our previous vacuum that just usually blew dirt around the room was not going to cut it. we got a kenmore canister vacuum - you know, the kind where you have to drag the vacuum around behind you like a disobedient dog on a leash? it's the kind my mom had (and my bff leah's mom) and we kids always hated it and begged for an upright, but looking back, my mother has had 2 vacuums in her entire life, and they've both been these kind. so i decided that i didn't want to buy a new vacuum 2 years from now, so i'd go for the errant dog style one.

4. maybe i'm not a domestic failure.

5. i started making my little clutches to sell on etsy. they're super stylish and fun. i hope they sell.

yeah, i know, i do own a real camera. but let's be honest: i have no real photo editing software, and this is just easier. it's 6 steps faster.